My Thought On Being Diabetic

DCKMANo one ever dreams of being a Type 2 diabetic, any version of it. Yes, I am going to eat crappy unhealthy food and be twice the weight I should be at 41. My dreams didn’t include pricking my finger twice a day and injecting myself with animal insulin because my pancreas decided to become resistant.  Who knew that becoming depressed, anxious, and bored leads to bad food choices? No one told me while growing up that my emotions would get the best of me and I’d be lying in bed for hours at a time and not moving.  Is it someone elses fault that I am this way? No, I take sole responsibility, but it would of been nice to know why the little voice that tells you when to stop eating wasn’t telling me to stop while eating 3 boxes of hoho’s…oh yes…a day at one point.

Really, you would of thought I’d wake up when I ended up having gestational diabetes while pregnant with both my kids.  Hellooo earth to Kelly, big NEON freakin sign. Nope.  Nor did I wake up while my mother had bypass surgery in Oct 2008. The constant nagging on the part of my Doctor nor his wonderful PA did not persuade me to change my evil foodie habits.  And when I had to go on insulin I kept going on a roller coaster, taking it, being diligent for a couple of months and then nothing, absolutely non compliant…for years…on…  So it’s 2015 and in the words of my father “Shit or get off the pot”…’s time to get “off the pot” meaning I have to do here it is…journaling.  My sister the writer has been trying to get me to do this for years, I’m not good with paper and pen.  But I have my own blog!  I can not promise a daily journal of everything I do or feel but I will try my best.  You may come along for the rid, comment, suggest, but don’t tell me what I should and shouldn’t do or eat because that is trying to control me and telling me what to do..if it where that easy to stop eating the foods I crave I’d of done it already!! I didn’t get this way overnight and it’s not all going to magically fall off overnight.  I am going to cry, whine, and make excuses just so you know…but don’t worry..I know I’m going to be just fine!


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